For a little breakaway fun, I’m taking a lighthearted look at a few books that I like, but aspects that I don’t. So I’m using “Turkey” to mean specifics instead of generalizations.
“Gone With The Wind:” Yes, the greatest film ever made, but this is about the book. Scarlett O’Hara, one of the most famous heroines in literary history, can’t get over the one man totally unsuitable for her on every level, and unable to love a rich, handsome man that loves the ground she walks on. In the book, she’s a despicable mother. Scarlett, you’re a Turkey.
“Little Women:” My Mom gave me this book when I was a preteen, and if I had a daughter, I’d have given a copy to her. I love this book. I wanted to be Jo. But I wouldn’t have been so stupid to turn down Laurie. Jo, you’re a Turkey.
“Catch-22:” I sympathized with a Blog Farm article whose author read another one of Joseph Heller’s books and hated it. The huge character cast and the AWOL of the lead character at the end of “Catch-22” doesn’t help carry the inner tragic message of this book. Yossarian, you’re a Turkey.
“Revolutionary Road:” I’ve heralded Richard Yates’ masterpiece many times on this blog, but I’m sorry, with my poverty background, the anguished housewife over her half-decent husband, nice home, nice neighbors, and able to raise her kids is a hard sell to me. I suspect people in other parts of the world would agree. April Wheeler, you’re a Turkey.
“No Country For Old Men:” I make no secret that I read books after films. Cormac McCarthy is considered a great American Literary Treasure, and I don’t contest that at all. But for this book, even he should use quotation marks. Cormac, you’re a Turkey.
“We Were the Mulvaneys:” Why did I read this book? Oh, yes, I saw the film on Lifetime! I hoped the book would be better, and I was kind enough to give it three stars on Goodreads. But what kind of family sends their beautiful, kind teenage daughter away after she was assaulted? Michael and Corine Mulvaney, you are Turkeys.
OK, let me stop before I offend more people than I intend to. I love making fun of myself, so I’ll give it a go:
C.C.Cole: I know this author. She’s one of those people that think she can do anything, so she decided to write a dark fantasy series. She also decided to start smoking after college, and forgot to smoke her Virginia Slims menthol cigarettes after two weeks in her purse. She thinks she’s a Tribble on Twitter. She’s a Turkey.
“Act of Redemption:” C.C.Cole’s first novella of the Gastar Series. It begins with a mean little assassin deciding to rub out some bad guys without a death order. You know, she could have asked. Shevata, you’re a Turkey. (don't tell her I said that).
“Children of Discord:” C.C.Cole’s second of the four novellas in the Gastar Series. A group of vampires summon Shevata against her will hoping they can intimidate her into cooperating with them. How did they think that would really turn out? Vampires, you’re Turkeys.